jump to navigation

Into Darkness, Indeed 24.05.2013

Posted by Commodore Mendez in Movie reviews.
Tags: , ,
1 comment so far
Young Douchey Kirk. Or might as well be.

Young Douchey Kirk. Or might as well be.

Movie: Star Trek Into Darkness (2013)


Plot: Douchey Trek returns
 to drag the franchise further into a Dark Age

IMHO: Young Douchey Kirk 2.0 and crew are back for brightly flared shenanigans. J.J. Abrams (Alcatraz) and excessively employed hacks Roberto Orci, Alex Kurtzman, and Damon Lindelof pilot their dumbed-down abomination a tiny step toward political commentary (on drone warfare) and then quickly veer away, so the audience doesn’t have to think. The great character of Khan is rebooted as a terrorist named Sherlock, things explode, and the rest of the plots pisses all over classic Star Trek moments. Sadly, this mess may be what future generations think of when they think Trek.

Compared to the great Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan: This movie destroys life in favor of its new matrix.

If William Shatner had directed it: He would’ve taken all 12 of Nimoy’s lines.

If Scotty had seen the movie with me: He’d have said, “And if my grandmother had wheels, she’d be a wagon.”

SPOILER: Leonard Nimoy shows he’s as willing as Shatner is to take a paycheck to do crap.

RATING: 0 Nomads out of 5