jump to navigation

Murderer of Steel 19.06.2013

Posted by Commodore Mendez in Movie reviews.
Tags: , , ,
add a comment

Movie: Man of Steel (2013)

Any resemblance to the Superman you know and love is strictly coincidental

Any resemblance to the Superman you know and love is strictly coincidental

Plot: Space Jesus battles Space Satan, or a relentlessly violent remake of The Hidden

IMHO: Serial characters are corporate properties and so, like colas and cars, are subject to constant tweeking for greater returns. Superman, around since 1938 and arguably the first superhero of the modern age, has been the subject of wonderful interpretations, e.g., The Adventures of Superman, Richard Donner’s Superman, Superman: The Animated Series, as well as horrible visions, e.g., Lois and Clark, the tedious Smallville, and now Man of Steel. Via Chris “Why So Serious” Nolan, Zack Snyder (Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole) and David Goyer (Kickboxer 2: The Road Back) bring us the meanest, most cynical version of Superman yet, falling into the now-cliche trap of reboots: in an effort to give us something new, they end up giving us poorly conceived dreck that highlights product (and product placement) and mishandles much of what makes a character lovable and memorable. Man of Steel is a Superman for 11-year-old cheese-eating gamer boys who have not yet developed any sense of taste, who consume without discernment, and who lap up exploding things and sexist images. Henry Cavill fills out the extremely ugly costume well (ugly costumes now being a DCU movie universe staple), but beyond the physical he is strictly flat, handsome but charmless. Amy Adams plays herself gorgeously, adding nothing to Lois Lane (for which the blame no doubt falls on Snyder, who prefers thighs to brains). Michael Shannon is fine, almost Shakespearean, but ultimately forgettable. The plot tries to add heavy science fiction elements, but these all feel borrowed from too many sources. Also: yet another conveniently disappearing black hole. And the ending? There is no excuse for it. A hero is a role model. A hero represents our better selves. A Superman who breaks the neck of his opponent is a not a hero. The Superman of the comic books found thousands of ways to stop evil without resorting to murder. Yes, Superman has killed in comics (thank you, John Byrne; asshole) and movies before, but never so openly and so brutally. Per Snyder, this is the moment Superman learns that killing is bad; but you’d think 33 years on Earth with superpowers he would have accidentally killed a few things and learned that lesson a lot earlier. Do yourself a favor and watch a Superman that brings you a sense of wonder and joy, not this murderous doppleganger.

Compared to the great Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan: This movie indicates two-dimensional thinking.

If William Shatner had directed it: The studio would have slashed his FX budget and forced him to destroy one city block instead of hundreds.

If Scotty had seen the movie with me: He’d have said, “It’s no use. We’re dead in space.”

SPOILER:  “The American Way” apparently reflects American war policy

RATING: 0 Nomads out of 5